{"id":248716,"date":"2021-04-02T10:57:10","date_gmt":"2021-04-02T17:57:10","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.lulus.com\/blog\/?p=248716"},"modified":"2021-10-13T16:39:09","modified_gmt":"2021-10-13T23:39:09","slug":"what-i-wish-i-knew-parenting-advice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lulus.com\/blog\/lifestyle\/what-i-wish-i-knew-parenting-advice\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Things I Wish I Knew Before I Had Kids"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Image via @ellapcobb; Shop Bump-Friendly Dresses<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Becoming a mom is the best decision I’ve ever made. I love my kids and genuinely enjoy spending time with them, even when it’s 24\/7 due to COVID restrictions. They’re funny and smart and adorable, and I honestly can’t get enough of them. But let’s get real about parenting for a minute.<\/p>\n

Although I’m grateful for my family, that doesn’t mean that raising two small humans is all sunshine and rainbows and puppies<\/a>. Motherhood is hard. Ten years after giving birth to my son, there are still plenty of days where I feel frustrated, scared, and confused–like I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing.<\/p>\n

That said, I have learned a thing or two about parenting in the past decade. Obviously, everyone’s situation is different, but these are the biggest life lessons I’ve learned along the way. Whether you’re a mom-to-be<\/a>, a new mama<\/a> looking for parenting advice, or an experienced parent who could use a refresher, read on–and know you’re not alone.<\/p>\n

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Image via @dashashingarey; Shop Beach Accessories<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

1. Kids don’t come with an instruction manual.<\/h2>\n

When my kids were little, I read all of the parenting books, attended mommy-and-me classes, and asked for family members’ parenting advice every time a new situation arose. But guess what: I quickly learned that kids do not<\/em> come with an instruction manual. Everyone has a different parenting style and every child is different, so it really isn’t necessary to take a poll every single time your child refuses to try a new food or has a temper tantrum. Instead, trust your own instincts. You probably know a lot more than you think you do.<\/p>\n

2. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.<\/h2>\n

In the early days of motherhood, I wanted to prove that I could do it all. My son was a terrible sleeper so I spent most nights rocking him to sleep<\/a>, while my husband blissfully snored away in our bedroom. I hardly ever let anybody give him a bottle because my son had so much trouble latching on in our early breastfeeding<\/a> days. I didn’t want to feel like a failure again. So, I pretty much just stopped sleeping. I was running on fumes, which wasn’t good for me or the baby, but I felt so much pressure to prove that I was a good mom. Please don’t make the same mistakes that I did. If you’re lucky enough to have a supportive partner, don’t try to do everything alone!<\/p>\n

3. Kids are resilient.<\/h2>\n

The first time a nurse put my son in my arms, I was terrified I was going to drop him. Changing diapers made me break out in a cold sweat. Swaddling was like doing intricate origami. I worried I’d never get the hang of parenting but, honestly, by the time he and my daughter were born, what choice did I really have? So I just winged it and hoped for the best. Luckily, I learned quickly that kids are much more resilient than we think. My son actually did roll off the bed once when I was changing his diaper and guess what. He was fine! My daughter has fallen off her scooter more times than I can count. Shockingly, she is also fine!<\/p>\n

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Image via @lauramvila; Shop Swim<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

4. Don’t forget self-care.<\/h2>\n

In the early days of motherhood, I pretty much gave everything I had over to my children. After having two miscarriages, I was just grateful to be a mom–so much so, that I decided I wouldn’t put myself first anymore. But, as my kids got older, I quickly came to the realization that I really wasn’t doing anybody any favors. I constantly felt run down until I started carving out more solo time<\/a> for myself. It may feel selfish to insist on spending an hour or two alone each day. But, remember, you can’t take care of anybody else if you don’t take care of yourself<\/a> first.<\/p>\n

5. You’re parenting–you don’t have to be their friend.<\/h2>\n

Saying \u201cno\u201d is never easy, especially when you feel like it’s the most overused word in your vocabulary. But trying to be your children’s best friend isn’t always possible. Yes, you want them to know that they can always talk to you. You want them to know you’ll always be there for them. But there’s a big difference between comforting your kids and being a total pushover. You can still be supportive without letting your children run you ragged. And, remember, discipline isn’t a four-letter word.<\/p>\n

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Image via @nickievu; Shop Wedding Dresses<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

6. Prioritize your marriage.<\/h2>\n

It’s so easy to get caught up in the chaos of parenthood. Whether it’s helping your kids with homework, organizing playdates, or shuttling them back-and-forth to soccer practice, you’re constantly on the go. But making time for regular date nights<\/a> and romantic weekends with your partner is just as important as making time for your kids. You still need to let your spouse know that he or she is important to you and remind yourself of all the reasons why you fell in love in the first place. Prioritizing your relationship is one of the best pieces of parenting advice I can give. And it isn’t just healthy for your marriage<\/a>; ultimately, it’s beneficial for your entire family.<\/p>\n

7. Shh! They’re always<\/em> listening.<\/h2>\n

Even if they have headphones on…even if you think they’re asleep…even if they’re engrossed in a video game. The truth is your kids are always listening. So be careful what you say–and where you say it, especially if you’re having a disagreement with your partner or planning a surprise birthday party<\/a>. There’s always a risk of them overhearing you, so it’s best to have private conversations in private if you really want them to stay that way.<\/p>\n

8. Set a good example.<\/h2>\n

You are your child’s biggest role model. So, if you want them to grow up to be good human beings, try making sure you act like one yourself. Of course, nobody’s perfect. We all have bad days. We all make our fair share of mistakes<\/a>. But waking up and trying to lead by example every single day is the best way to teach your children that kindness–not trophies, good grades, or sports stardom–is what matters most to you and your family.<\/p>\n

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Image via @simplydaph; Shop Knitwear<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

9. Make mom friends.<\/h2>\n

I don’t know how I would have gotten through the first few years of motherhood without my mom friends. There’s something to be said for having at least a few friends who are going through the exact same thing as you at the exact same time. One of my best friends is actually a mom I met in a mommy-and-me yoga<\/a> group when our sons were just six months old. As I mentioned earlier, he’s 10 now. A whole decade later, she’s still somebody I can always call for good parenting advice whenever I’m struggling with a problem.<\/p>\n

10. Time flies.<\/h2>\n

It may sound clich\u00e9, but kids really do grow up fast. I feel like it was just yesterday that mine were both babies, but they’re already 8 and 10 years old. So, on days where you feel stretched so thin that you feel like you might actually snap, take a deep breath and try to take a step back. Although life might be hectic, and you can rarely take a shower more than ten minutes long, the time you get to spend with your kids really is precious. There will eventually come a day where they no longer see you as the coolest person in the world, so try to relax, take it all in and enjoy it while you still can.<\/p>\n

Share your parenting advice in the comments! If you’re searching for cute maternity dresses (or in need of comfy, stylish postpartum picks!), shop our Bump-Friendly<\/a> edit–and show us your mom style on Instagram @Lulus<\/a> using #lovelulus!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Becoming a mom is the best decision I’ve ever made. I love my kids and genuinely enjoy spending time with them, even when it’s 24\/7 due to COVID restrictions. They’re funny and smart and adorable, and I honestly can’t get enough of them. But let’s get real about parenting for a minute. Although I’m grateful… Read more »<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":146,"featured_media":248736,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[42077],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-248716","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-lifestyle"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nParenting Advice: What I Wish I Knew Before I Had Kids - Lulus.com Fashion Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Whether you're a mom-to-be, a new or experienced mama, read one woman's top motherhood lessons and parenting advice. 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